Real World Recap – Dunbar Locks Up the Douchebag of the Year Award.

This episode opens at night with a shot of Ashli sleeping in her bed. We see Dunbar come in and jump into bed with her (trust, that sequence is important). Cut to Ashli in the confessional – “He would do anything he wanted if he knew that Julie wouldn’t find out.” We then see Isaac and Dunbar talking (presumably, either Dunbar got out of bed or this is poor sequential editing. I vote for option B), and Isaac asks Dunbar “Why does every girl in this house want to bang you?” Failing to detect the sarcasm, Dunbar replies “Because I have a girlfriend.” Follow me after the jump to experience Dunbar in all of his douchebaggery.

During their conversation, Dunbar tells Isaac that Ashli just won’t leave him alone (umm – you jumped into her bed, douchebag), and then follows that up by revealing that Cohutta and KellyAnne are knocking boots (lterally – I think they both leave their cowboy boots on during sex. Perverts). We then see Cohutta and KellyAnne in bed, where Noirin and Parissa (in the next room) overhear them having crazy sex. All of a sudden, Cohutta says that the condom broke, and KellyAnne absolutely freaks out since she is not on birth control. Cohutta tells KellyAnne that if she is pregnant, she will have to come to Georgia with him.

The next morning, Cohutta repeats his wishes (commands?) that KellyAnne come back to Georgia and they get married if she is pregnant. Meanwhile, Dunbar decides to tell Cohutta that he heard them having sex. KellyAnne takes the opportunity to go call her sister and tell her that Cohutta is freaking her out with his talk of marriage. In the other room, Noirin asks Dunbar questions about his relationship with Julie, and she implies that she knows that Dunbar had sex with Ashli. Surprisingly, he denies it. Ashli is also in the middle of lying about her relationship with Dunbar, telling her mother that she just cuddles with him. Her mother tells her not to undermine Dunbar’s relationship with Julie. After that, it is Cohutta’s turn on the phone, and he calls his grandfather and tells him about the pregnancy scare (NOT a conversation I would have ever had with my grandfather). His grandfather tells him to remember what it means to be a man, and that “your true colors come out in a crisis” (apparently, his grandfather’s wisdom is a mixture of Kenny Rogers and Cyndi Lauper). Meanwhile, KellyAnne goes to weigh herself, since she obviously would have gained weight already if she were pregnant.

That night, everyone goes out to the bar and while Isaac and Noirin continue to talk about Ashli and Dunbar having sex, Dunbar continues to deny it. On their way home, Ashli tells Noirin that she is pissed off that people are talking about her sex life, particularly when she is not even around to defend herself.

The next morning, we see Dunbar and Ashli in bed. Dunbar tells Ashli “I gotta get Julie to have a threesome” (yes, I’m sure that will happen), to which Ashli responds “I don’t want you to think you’re in charge” (well, stop cuddling with him then, dammit!). After a little while, Ashli goes to talk to KellyAnne about Dunbar, and she says that she is really getting “grossed out” by Dunbar’s cocky attitude. This is reinforced later in the day when the roommates are trying to set up a computer schedule for their work and Dunbar verbally abuses Ashli once again.

That night, the roommates go out for “cowboy-cowgirl night” and Cohutta and KellyAnne share their first public kiss (how nice).

The next morning, KellyAnne is on the phone with her mom, and she tells her that she will be going to church that night. So, later in the evening KellyAnne and Cohutta go to church, presumably to pray that she isn’t pregnant.

The following morning, KellyAnne is working out while Cohutta is on the computer. To the relief of both of them, she receives her monthly visitor (I’ve heard that working out can bring it on if you are close). Their happiness is soon ruined by the rest of the roommates arguing over the computer again. Dunbar and Ashli really get into it, and he says “You’re being a stupid bitch” (oh, smooth!), and follows that up by calling her a bitch repeatedly. Ashli goes back in to her bedroom to talk to KellyAnne about Dunbar and she begins to cry.

That night, at the bar, Dunbar tries to “make nice” with Ashli by asking her not to be mad at him (note that he doesn’t actually apologize). Ashli tells Dunbar that she doesn’t feel like he respects her, and he responds with “I didn’t degrade you – it just happens” (oops, sorry I called you a bitch 17 times!). Since he is so damn charming (blech), the episode ends with Ashli smiling at Dunbar lovingly.