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DeadOn’s 411 on 90210 – By Accident Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Posted by JB* in 90210, Hot chicks, I Should Be Sleeping, JB*, maybe you should read a book instead, more indepth than probably need-be, Television, The CW Will Put Anything On, Things That May Suspend Your Man License, TV.
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With promises of car crashes and broken relationships dancing in our heads, those of us hunkered down in long underwear and extra furry hats descend upon our televisions to revel in 90210 and tawdry goodness.

Join me, after the jump, to get DeadOn’s 411 on 90210 for Episode 14, “By Accident”

This week, Hip Teacher Obviously Inspired By Dead Poets Society Ryan Matthews is back from his suspension for kissing an undercover cop posing as a student, and he has a chip on his shoulder, blowing off Kelly Taylor and telling

What Happened to the Main Cast of Characters
Harry Wilson
It was a low key night from the former Silk Stalking star, as he makes just a brief appearance with Ryan Matthews at the beginning and gets his daughter from her room near the end. A good thing really – too much Rob Estes exposure is probably bad for the complexion.

Debbie Wilson
Aunt Becky makes one appearance tonight, imparting parental guidance that sometimes, you have to use your words when in a fight. Profound wisdom.

Annie Wilson
Thoughts of starring as Cleopotra in the school play dominate her mind throughout the episode. She tries to woo Ethan into performing with her, but his strength is obviously on the lacrosse field. After line reading with Big Actor Boy Ty, she falls short of the Cleopatra role, ending up as the favorite servant girl. This jilting leaves her in a funk, unwilling to join her boyfriend for the Cast and Crew Dinner. She eventually changes her mind and calls Ethan to pick her up, and only hears fateful silence after a thud.

Dixon Wilson
Dixon is all sentimental, opining how Silver unintentionally offends people with her intensity, obviously discussing his own feelings post-“I Love You”. Later, he confides in his mother the whole “I told her love her and we fought” thing. I think we learned from Momma’s Boys that this is a recipe for disaster. He shows up at the cast & crew dinner, where Silver won’t stop gushing about getting back into the good class. He interrupts to tell her she is stormy with big moods (coming in from the Northwest, I believe), and he is breaking up with her.

Naomi Clark
After being psychoteen last week, Naomi turns around to be SuperSupportGirl this week, offering Adrianna unsolicited advice at every turn. She then gets a whammy upside the head when her father informs her that Momma Tracy is somewhere “relaxing” and he is selling the house. Imagine her surprise when she returns to the house to find Daddy shtupping the real estate broker.

Also – her “outrage” acting is lacking and more fake than her tan.

Ethan Ward
Despite his attempts to join Annie in the school play, Ethan is a butcher on the line reading. Somehow, though, he comes through, earning the role of a eunuch, but cannot convince Annie to come to the cast and crew party. When she changes her mind and asks him to come pick her up, he is so excited he misses a stop sign. The closing sound of the show is that of an accident.

Silver
Shocked and offended by being kicked out of the Cool Teacher’s class for being critical of him in her blog, she claims she will “show him” by writing a paper… for a class she is not even in. Once Mr. Matthews reads it, he is impressed by her insight and interest, but not her crutch of words ending in “ass”, and recommends she get a thesaurus for the next assignment. Her self-obsessiveness makes her blind to Dixon’s anger over their fight, so she looks blindsided by the break-up.

Adrianna Duncan
It is a tad ironic that the next play is Antony and Cleopatra, since Adrianna is in “denial.” See what I did there? Despite the whole “pregnancy” thing, Adrianna is chugging coffee and auditioning – a lot. She’s just too busy, she tells Naomi, to get to the doctor. When Naomi (abortion!) and Kelly (Keep! Adopt! Ponder!) try to provide guidance, she tells them to stick it and drives off into the sunset, ultimately almost getting run off the road as she starts to doze. The light has shone, as the next time she is on-screen, it is pulling into the women’s clinic. Adrianna then shows up to audition several hours late, then performs Cleopatra’s suicide scene unprompted. Casting director looks impressed.

She finds Naomi at the beach later that night, spoiling the big debate – she went to abort, but she is too far along; legally, she cannot abort the child. While others are abuzz with the news of her being cast as Cleopatra, Adrianna gets reassurance from Naomi and Kelly about the baby and her next steps… dropping the news that Ty must be the father.

Navid Shirazi
Navid really must have needed more time to think, since he is nowhere to be found this week. Poor guy.

Kelly Taylor
Interventions! First, she goes after Adrianna with Naomi, then at Ryan for “taking out his anger” on Silver.

Secondary Characters
Ryan Matthews – Finally back, he transfers Silver out of his class, thanks to her blog article calling him a “child molesting pervert”. He is burnt out, he claims, and will be punching the clock until the end of year before going off to whatever he finds next.

Tabitha Wilson – Sadly, off filming Red Coats and Blue Bloods.

Tracy Clark – Apparently in New York, “resetting” herself.

Brenda Walsh – Absent

Conclusion
Does anyone else have a CW with such a terrible advertising campaign? I am pretty sure twenty percent of my commercials are for FreeCreditReport.com and Cash4Gold, plus an occasional ShamWOW! Commercial.

Next Week
Nothing, but in two weeks, there’s allegedly fall out from the break-up and a hospital trip in store for Ethan. Now, that’ll be seventy-five cents for dialing up the 411.

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Comments»

1. DougOLis - Thursday, January 22, 2009

Lame episode; probably the worst one so far.

Does this mean Ty and Adrianna actually did hook up that one night?


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