The Office “Business Trip” Recap

Look at that cold-eyed deadbeat. Probably back on the drugs. Did you hear him last week? Still so darned full of himself. And that stupid half zipped up sweater. And that stupider beard. Who do you think you are, Ben Gibbard? Actually, he’s more of a Dwight I guess. I honestly don’t know which one that is.

Why all the negativity? Because evidently, BJ Novak would rather hang out with Quentin Tarantino and Brad Pitt than continue appearing on “The Office.” Jan is also taking a hiatus to go impersonate Renee Zellwegger on Broadway.

This week, David sends Michael to Winnipeg on a business trip, presumably as attempted retribution for sending his girl back to Nashua. Remind me never to switch over until like five seconds after it starts, so I don’t have to see the end of “Kath and Kim” ever again.

In Italy you wash your hands after using the restroom. In Japan, you must commit suicide or you’ll be embarrassed. Those are a couple facts Michael leads in with to tell the employees about his trip “Ca-NAH-da,” which is French for Canada. Michael has “always been intrigued with all things international. The women, the pancakes, The Man of Mystery.” He then covers Meredith’s face with his jacket to replicate sexiness in Abu Dhabi.

Jim is really excited for Pam to come back from art school in NY, and Creed is really creepy about it. Stanley chuckles, Phyllis smiles. Jim feels they are all being intrusive.

Michael has his passport and his $50 per diem. David Wallace explains in confessional that it’s a two birds with one stones thing to send Michael to Winnipeg in mid-November and to give him some repayment for sending his girl away. He tells Michael to see the concierge for his nightlife needs.

Andy is going with Michael as his French translator. Jim said he forgot French. Oscar is going too.

Michael is staging “Cribs: Business Class Edition” while sipping a momosa. Andy: “Michael G. Scott rollin’ like a pimp.” Oscar made egg salad sandwiches, Michael calls them stinky, equates them to baby poop, but then wishes he hadn’t because the flight isn’t serving food. Instead of eating he will take a nap aided by his complimentary blindfold.

Ryan is moving back to Kelly’s nook, and he goes back to address the obvious potential for tension. Then he starts doing pushups, but she isn’t impressed. At least that’s what she said before they started making out. That’s what she said, boom baby.

Michael and Andy are looking for the concierge to find a good place to eat. Michael instantly falls in love with her, and he says that a concierge is the Winnipeg equivalent of a geisha, who has been trained in the fine arts of fanciness and pleasure. When you meet one, it is intoxicating. Just what the doctor ordered.

Back at the office Pam calls Jim and tells him she has to stay another twelve weeks in New York because she failed a computer course. Pam asks if Jim can do another three months of long distance, then starts crying when he tries to be understanding; she hangs up with a made excuse of a dying cell battery. I told you they were breaking up.

Michael has Andy and Oscar as his wing-men at the bar where the concierge told him and Andy that she would be that evening. The introductions are awkward, Michael keeps saying “How you say?” before everything descriptive, as if the woman doesn’t speak English.

Andy is trying to hook Oscar up two potentially gay guys, but they ask him to leave them alone. Andy says that Oscar struck out. They drink the Long Island Iced Teas that Andy had bought to send to the dudes. This will end well.

Michael is still fascinated with the concierge’s worldliness, now through her knowledge of Winnipeg’s dry cleaning.

Andy and Oscar get hammered, Oscar wants to know what is wrong with Angela because Andy and Angela have not yet had sex. Andy drunk dials Angela, Dwight whispers in the background, Andy is too drunk to notice, because he’s also trying to convince Angela that he’s not drunk. Andy says they will discuss his needs later, naked.

Michael leaves the concierge’s room asking if she wants to get some breakfast, she responds by closing the door. She opens the door and Michael looks back hopefully, but she places his shoes on the floor and closes the door again. I want to know what happened, right freakin’ now… enter commercial.

Everyone is staring at Jim sadly. Dwight criticizes Pam’s painting of the office building. Andy and Oscar share a laugh about the call to Angela in the lobby, only Andy thought he had dreamed that. Minor Bernard freakout.

In the break room, Ryan and Kelly are making out and he tells her that he will only continue doing pushups if she breaks up with Darryl. Darryl is cool with it, Ryan is disappointed at the lack of intended conflict.

Michael goes to the meeting the next morning and is weepy and wistful over his latest lost love. He manages to lock the buyers in for two years, presumably through sympathy.

Andy tells Oscar Angela is taking him back to first base, which consists of forehead kisses. They share a handshake over their friendly weekend. Andy had to go all the way to Canada to find out that the guy sitting twnety feet away is “delightful.”

Michael speaks to David Wallace, angry over everything about the trip, including the concierge tip David gave him. Turns out he was really angry about David sending Holly away and his anger finally boils over, then he hangs up on David.

Jim walks into the late afternoon parking lot to find Pam with no art degree, they share a heartfelt greeting and kiss, then Dwight abruptly asks her for five copies of something. Yeah, yeah, I was wrong about the breakup.

They are selling the mugs from last episode, that’s pretty clever.

Ryan and Kelly are holding hands after the break, Ryan clearly worried about what he got himself into. I’m assuming his write off is going to be pretty crazy. I hope he fights Darryl for not wanting Kelly. Something crazy better happen to justify that weasel’s leaving, trying to be a movie star. That’s right, I called him a weasel.