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The Hills – “Paris Changes Everything” Monday, March 24, 2008

Posted by Matt_T in matt_T, more indepth than probably need-be, the balls, The Hills, Things too long to read.

Hello Friends, I’ll be taking you through another season of my favorite, totally not scripted at all reality show.

Finally, Lauren has made it to Paris, she and Whitney arrive in the airport. Their driver for Teen Vogue picks them up and they butcher the name of one of the stores they are supposed to go to. They decide to go pick up their gowns rather than pick up shoes for the debutantes. I think this may end up being a bad decision. Cue the Natasha Beddingfield and join me and the gang after the jump.

Our first shot of Heidi (hissssss). She’s snowboarding in Colorado with her mom. Mom says something that they both need to grow as people. Gee you think?

Whitney and LC go pick up their dresses, and Whitney delivers the line of the night so far “You love feathers.” They leave and show up at the shoe store, and hey look at that, the store is closed. LC: “Well it was either we go naked or the debs go shoeless.” I think the going naked would have been a nice option. Whitney’s nervous that they’ve already screwed up, and feels like she’s going to barf. Derek Zoolander thinks that’s a great way to lose a few lbs before a show.

Quick transition to Spencer (hisssssss) in LA. He’s cooking or something when ShePratt shows up and tells him his place looks horrible. He tells her Heidi left, but she doesn’t seem really concerned and tells him he should do the opposite of what he thinks she does.

Whitney and LC are trying to figure out what to do. Whitney points out they have an itinerary. I don’t think they know what that means.

Spencer lands in Crested Butte. (heh heh heh). He shows up and calls Heidi’s Dad, Tim. He doesn’t seem happy to see Spence, but who really is? Yeah, showing up unannounced is never a good idea.

LC and Whit show up at the shoot with the shoes, and our pal Kimball from Teen Vogue is running the shoot. “Teen Vogue loves smiles” Why yes they do. Whit is in charge of getting quotes and such. LC’s phone is ringing and she excuses herself to take the call. (Nice work ethic). Its Audrina. Oh hey Audrina, welcome to the new season. She says she saw Brody out with a girl he was calling his girlfriend. Wow, what a shock. LC sheds a few crocodile tears.

Now its back to Crested Butte. Heidi and her mom come home and Spencer pops out with roses. Creepy. She’s not happy to see him and points out that this is all about him as usual.

Back to Paris. Lauren is wearing a hideous shade of lipstick. They go to the club to meet some guys in a band that Lauren met in LA. French rocker dude calls her Lau-ren. And says they should go see the Eiffel Tower. (awwww). Drummer has a Flock of Seagulls Hairdo and a unibrow. He suggests they pop champagne at the Eiffel Tower. They walk off and rocker dude puts his arm around Lau-ren. (Smooth!). Drummer pops champagne and LC proclaims “We’re here!”

Next Morning,in the hotel room and LC is looking up French words and calls Brody a word for scum and says she needs a rebound. The rockers text Lau-ren and want to meet up and say they want to go out. LC doesn’t have anything to wear and decides she should alter her ball gown to wear out. I sense this is another bad idea.

Back to Crested Butte (heh heh heh) and the Heidi clan and Spence (hisssss) are at dinner and I can feel the awkwardness through the TV. Heidi makes a toast to her parents for loving her no matter what and says that’s about it and asks if he’s planning on staying long. (Ouch sick burn). Heidi gets her mom involved.

Cut to Paris. Cue the Kanye “Flashing. Lights” The girls look fab, and meet the Rockers who are showing a lot of chest hair. Rocker boy and Lau-ren make googley eyes at each other. He asks if she’s dating anyone. (Smooth!). The girls leave club, and Rocker dude runs after her and says “You did not kiss me bye bye” in his accent. Lau-ren gives him a smooch.

Cue next morning and Whitney doesn’t seem very happy with Teen Vogue (Foreshadowing!). Lau-ren grabs her dress to take the stitches out and sees what she thinks is a stain, only to realize (spoiler alert) she left the curling iron on and it burned the dress. Whoops! And she’s crying. Awww. Whitney calls and says they had a “setback” +1 Whitney.

The designer says they can have another dress if they are there in 15 minutes. Cue upbeat music. They get there and the door is locked. Oh No! But he comes down with another dress for Lau-ren. Yay, the day is saved.

Back to Crested Butte (heh heh heh). Spence (hiss) and Heidi are at some cafe. She asks him when he’s leaving again. Ouch. He regrets coming out. Well no kidding. They bicker back and forth. And she wants him to be moved out when she comes back.

To the ball.The girls look fab. LC takes photos. Whitney seems very bored, I’m not even sure what she’s supposed to be doing. Kimball asks how she thinks she did. She half ass says she doesn’t really like what she’s been doing and wants to do styling. Kimball says she should go into that. Rocker dude calls Lau-ren and wants to take her out. And he’s wearing a leather jacket, smoking a cigarette and is on a moped. Lau-ren hops right on in her fancy ball gown and he gives her a ride around the city. She doesn’t seem very into him, but he tells him to call when he’s in LA again.

Morning after and Lau-ren recaps the night for Whitney. Whitney says she’s ready for a change and doesn’t want to be stuck behind a desk. (Who hasn’t said/thought that). They don’t want to go home.

Crested Butte (heh heh) again. Spence (hiss) apologizes, Heidi sheds some crocodile tears and says she needs more time and she’ll call when she gets back to LA.

Nice juxtaposition by MTV of LC and Whitney and Spence (hiss) leaving to head back to L.A.


1. DougOLis - Tuesday, March 25, 2008

re dresses vs. shoes: Whitney, I choose the former, get naked

I hate Spencer’s sister but she did seem kind of normal in this episode (and in the previews for the future). Guess she doesn’t want to be the hated one on the show and become popular/famous herself.

I loved when Whitney kind of laughed and her reaction hearing that Brody was dating some other chick after 2 days. Hilarious. Whitney seems the most normal on the show and is by far my favorite of the girls.

Heidi’s dad’s looks of disgust at Spencer using his iPhone were awesome. Why the fuck didn’t Spencer offer to help him shovel the snow? That would have been a nice way to gain some favor. Do you think their parents watch the show? Is that why Heidi’s parents hate Spencer so much? (Among other things of course)

Those guys in the band had to have been thinking “American girls are so easy” when they suggested taking them to the Eiffel Tower with a bottle of champagne.’

Oh man, you’re fucking retarded Lauren. Don’t use your gown.

Creepy French dudes in the club, alright. Lauren’s guy was just leering at her when she was talking to the other dude (also creepy guy) and then following her out was pretty stalkerish.

And Spencer reaffirms himself as a giant douche at their tea. He’s got a bit of a Ron Burgundy thing going on too.

OMG, Stephen’s back!

2. Nonya - Monday, March 31, 2008

when is this coming to the UK. it seems like things are just getting interesting. Stephen’s in LA!!!! No way!!!!!!
is it true that Heidi and Spencer’s engagement is fake? I cant find the episode when he proposed anywhere!

i wonder how much the girls get payed for this show. I heard LC bought a new house that the girls will be moving into on the show. Lucky them.

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