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Real World Recap – Relationship Drama (Surprise!) Friday, September 7, 2007

Posted by The NY Kid in Fuck You Nibbles, MTV, reality TV, undergroundBTO.

So, this episode opens with an early morning view of KellyAnne crawling into bed with Cohutta, who is still sleeping. As he drifts in and out (not like that, pervs!), she begins rubbing his back. After several minutes of non-response, KellyAnne finally gives up and goes out into the living room. We see KellyAnne saying insightful things such as “He’s not my type” and “It’s just a phase”. Considering this show’s penchant (look it up!) for foreshadowing, why don’t you join me after the jump to view her pathetic shenanigans?

We see KellyAnne talking to Tricia about her boyfriend (huh? oh, he’ll be happy), and she mentions that they had mutually agreed to “take a break” while she was in Sydney (alrighty, then). She goes on to say that she always wonders if it is better to tell him about things that she does in Sydney right away, or if she should wait until she goes back home. This is followed by video evidence of her calling her boyfriend, and in within 1 minute of describing her day, she mentions that she was scratching Cohutta’s back (smooth!), to which her boyfriend (or is it ex-boyfriend?) responds “Why would you tell me that”. Somehow, KellyAnne does NOT respond with “Because I’m an immature and self-destructive dicktease who is afraid of commitment”, but simply begins crying instead. Noticing her pain (IT RUNS DEEP! SHARE IT WITH ME!), Tricia and Shauvon come into the phone room to hug her and provide moral support (sandwich!). After she hangs up, KellyAnne comes to a horrible realization – “What if I find out that I want to be with him and it’s too late?” (oops!).

Later in the day, the girls go out to lunch and Shauvon begins to dicuss her broken engagement. Not surprisingly, this upsets KellyAnne, who admits that commitment makes her nervous (no shit?). After Parissa badgers Shauvon about her love life to the point that Shauvon says she can’t talk about her ex-fiance anymore, KellyAnne gets up and goes off by herself to think about her own shambles of a love life. The girls catch up to her, and they continue to walk around and talk about how love has managed to elude all of them (here’s a hint – you’re all crazy harpies!)

(Sorry, I didn’t mean that. It was a tad misogynistic. I’m sure they’re all lovely young ladies).

Back at the house, Shauvon is still talking about her ex-fiance (I thought you didn’t want to talk about it, dammit!), and says that it has made her so defensive about men that “if I get into a fight with one of the boys in the house, I’ll snap” (wow, this episode is overloading on foreshadowing).

Later that night, we see Tricia flirting with Cohutta, which obviously makes KellyAnne mad (because she doesn’t care about him, see?) to the point where she tells the other girls “I wish they would at least wait one day” (this house is ready for a serious case of mono any day now). Everyone seems to be staying in for the night, and the drinking commences, which leads to a game of Twister. At one point Dunbar pulls KellyAnne aside and tells her that he is glad that she and Cohutta are getting together. As she is in the middle of denying this, we hear a scream from the other room (Twister accident?), and they go running off to see what had happened.

Back in the living room we see Shauvon on the floor, yelling at Isaac for dropping her. Isaac, meanwhile, claims that Shauvon was sitting on his lap and then just fell off because she is drunk. Shauvon demands an apology, which Isaac refuses to give, so she pours her bottle of water on her head. At that point, Isaac gets up and gets in her face, even looking like he might hit her at one point. Instead, he yells “I apologize that you’re a drunk-ass stupid slut!”, to which Shauvon yells back “I’m a slut because I wouldn’t sleep with you?” (oh, she’s got you there, buddy!). As Shauvon walks away crying, Isaac says “This is the most testing experience in my life in terms of anger” (really? Haven’t you been arrested before?).

KellyAnne talks to Isaac about the fact that his reaction should have been to ask Shauvon if she was ok, which he admits is true. She follows that up with “You kissed her and fucked someone else the next day”, as a reason for why Shauvon is on edge about him. KellyAnne then makes a comment about Cohutta and Tricia, which causes Isaac to realize that she has a crush on Cohutta (Isaac Marvin, Boy Detective!). Isaac goes over to Shauvon and says “I apologize for calling you a slut, you can apologize to me whenever” which is not exactly high on the sincerity scale. Shauvon has another mini-breakdown, stating that in the past her ex-fiance would have been there to simply punch Isaac in the mouth (yes, violence solves everything!).

The night ends with KellyAnne, Isaac and Cohutta in the music studio. After several minutes, KellyAnne leaves to get something to eat in the kitchen with Shauvon. Since they are both drunk, KellyAnne rambles on for a little bit about how she is “heart-broken” over Cohutta. She continues with this theme the next day when she describes a dream that she had in which Cohutta was married.

So, in the end this episode was all about love, crushes, and heartbreak in the lives of our young cast. This was a distinct lack of douchebagginess caused by relatively little focus on Dunbar. Maybe next time.



1. DougOLis - Friday, September 7, 2007

I think all women would come out psycho and all men would come out like douchebags if you followed them around 24 hours a day. Thus I hope no one I date, marry, screw, are related to, or are good friends with ever goes on the show.

I had a similar experience as Isaac right there. Some chick that wanted me was screwing around with me, we were both drunk, and I somehow dropped her on her head. The details are a bit fuzzy but I remember her not being happy.

2. The Fan's Attic - Sunday, September 9, 2007

You forgot the best part of Isaac’s apology. He says that when he gets mad at girls slut is the first thing that comes to mind, but then continues with other words, bitch, whore, cunt and Shauvon cries some more. Then he says you can apologize whenever you want. She apologizes. Then he leaves saying, this was a good talk. very good.

fucking hilarious.

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