New Movie Releases – Weekend of 8/10/07 Friday, August 10, 2007Posted by Tuffy in movies, new movie releases, tuffy.
Tags: marisa tomei finds cuba gooding jr distasteful
Pitch: Neil, you keep polishing the script while I swing a copy of The Princess Bride’s VHS sales numbers hypnotically in front of their faces…
Synopsis: Mr. Cox chases a magical MacGuffin through fantastic lands to prove his love to a frosty lass, learning many lessons about himself while experiencing grand adventures. No doubt, someone’s buckle will be swashed and someone’s relief will be comedied. (Needless to say, expensive fantasy quest movies didn’t get made often before Lord of the Rings because they’re too hard to explain in 30-second spots.)
Target Market: Neil Gaiman fans; fantasy fans; people that still get a bit verklempt when they quote, “As you wish.”
Why You Should See This Movie: Eventually, one of Gaiman’s properties will be given the A-level treatment by Hollywood. Early reviews suggest this may be the one.
Synopsis: Squeaky Murphy and Pretty Much Wasted collect paychecks on a different location and in new soundstages. Dogs howl in discontent at both Tucker’s voice and the screenplay. (Apparently, only dogs and critics can hear a weak first act followed by a miserable Act Two and Act Three.)
Target Market: Jackie Chan completists; Chris Tucker defeatists; Brett Ratner repeatists.
Why You Should See This Movie: You’re on the flight to Brisbane and it’s this or Alive for the next 10 hours. You might want to consider alcohol poisoning.
An uneven but pleasant dorkfest about high school debate; an intriguing love story from Julie Delpy, who continues the admirable trend of French women aging deliciously well; Cuba Gooding Jr.’s latest turd blossom special, directed by none other than Fred Savage. Mr. Gooding, Jr. regrets to this day that he invested in his line of Cuba’s Scalp Massage Salons throughout the Southeast.