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All Roads Lead to DeadOn: Does the Fed adjust Schrutebuck interest rates? Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Posted by Will Li in Bloggers Gone Wild, BowdenBowdenBowden, Elric, hatchet jobs, Holy crap, making enemies of nice people, Search Strings, the office.

I thought her luck ran out after the Friends series finale.  This is not a Great Movie You May Have Missed.

It’s been an interested week here at DeadOn. On May 10th, someone with the Fark handle Erotic Tangerines linked DeadOn’s running feature “The 20 Most Cromulent Simpsons Episodes of All Time: #15” in a Fark thread, which got us some nice traffic. Thank you, Erotic Tangerines, and may your sensual citrus-ness be blessed with eternal succulence.

That said, a couple of salacious searches aside, our traffic the past couple days has been dominated by two denominations. Follow me after the jump for some leprechaun to unicorn conversion rates.

Before I get to the posts which got the most attention, I would like to point out a couple searches that I couldn’t help but notice.


First, I don’t know if there’s an urban legend or something about a “lady that pooped in coffee cans,” but I can’t think of any other reason someone would want to enter that search term. I’m not going to look at the results either. In the words of The Ladies Man, uhh, yeah . . . that’s nasty.

And speaking of ladies (the real kind though, not the kind that defecates in coffee cans), someone might think that our Lady Andrea is a not the classy character who graces our presence, as they searched for “ladyandrea sex video.” Surprisingly, DeadOn doesn’t pop until the second page of that – the first two? Kissing Suzy Kolber and Deadspin. Apparently sex video discussions are that much more prominent on those sites. Clearly we have some catching up to do. If our Lady Andrea were to make a sex video though, I’m sure it would be way more classy than Kim Kardashian’s. Not that I watched it or anything, despite its availability on every bittorrent site on the internet.


On a lighter note, someone did search for the chords to Gillian Welch’s cover of Radiohead’s Black Star. If anyone has these, I would like them too.

Schrutebucks and Stanley Nickels!

Now, Suss– and Steve have to take a bow this week, as their respective sites Schrutebuck.com and StanleyNickel.com have been directly or indirectly responsible for the vast majority of our traffic over the past two days. Both sites have gotten recognition on TV blogs, including Officetally.com and TV.com, and a huge hit on Monday from USAToday.com, the only newspaper website that lets you print out a placemat to color with crayons to make the experience more like reading the print version.

Just kidding. I love the color-coded sections. Not to mention those pie charts. Did you know that 58% of American males between the ages of 25-36 who drink between 6 and 11 alcoholic beverages a week carry between $3500 and $7000 worth of credit card debt? Actually, that might be fairly accurate now that I think about it.

DeadOn has benefited to the tune of a few thousand visits, but what about the websites themselves?

StanleyNickel.com, since Friday, has logged over 36,000 hits as of about 8:00 last night, from various websites ranging from social networking sites (myspace, facebook, xanga, xxxfriendfinder – ok, I made that last one up) to TV blogs to music band message boards (notably, pearljam.com and phishhook.com). Thanks to Steve for providing the numbers and hit information.

Out of curiosity, I did a few related searches. Not surprisingly, both sites are at the top in searches for their names (although you have to search for the exact term “Stanley Nickel.”)

I did a search for “leprechaun to unicorn ratio” though, and got some interesting results. The first results are for the AmazonUK links to the movies “The Last Leprechaun” and “A Very Unlucky Leprechaun” (starring Warwick Davis! how many Leprechaun movies has he been in? I probably don’t want to know). I don’t know why “The Last Unicorn” isn’t in those results. Maybe Google doesn’t like the band America. Maybe Google just hates America.

My favorite result though, is the fourth in the Google search, a problem set for the Bio 113/244 class at Stanford (link goes to a .pdf), which is apparently an introductory PhD level course – Fundamentals of Molecular Evolution. The problem set is great though – not only does it include problems based on the premise:

“The population of unicorns has the effective size that is 10 times greater
than the effective size of the leprechaun population. The generation time of
leprechauns is 10 times longer than generation time of unicorns. You observe that
there are 500 nucleotide differences between the sequences of a particular gene in
leprechauns and unicorns. Assuming that the neutral theory is correct, and that
mutation rate per generation is the same in both unicorns and leprechauns

but it also includes problems based on a novel by Margaret Atwood, the elves of Middle-Earth, and “Horton Hears a Who!” It reminds me when I used generation times and cohort sizes to calculate the number of children dwarves had to have in order to sustain Tolkien’s premise that in Middle-Earth, dwarves seldom marry and that 2/3 of dwarves are male. Yes, I was really loopy while I was working on my English thesis.

I tip my hat to the professor. If I had problem sets like this as a bio major, maybe I wouldn’t have gotten so sick of classes that I tanked my last quarter and watched Red Sox games on NESN instead of going to any bio classes.



1. Jerkwheat - Tuesday, May 22, 2007

at the very least, I can provide you with the chords for an acoustic version of “Black Star”. Very easy to play (or at least fake your way through)

2. undergroundbto - Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Did you know that 58% of American males between the ages of 25-36 who drink between 6 and 11 alcoholic beverages a week carry between $3500 and $7000 worth of credit card debt?

I am PAINFULLY aware of that fact, thanks.

By the way, if Andie were to make a sex video with Footsteps Falco, we could double our traffic by getting the pervs AND the necropheliacs on here.

3. Suss-- - Tuesday, May 22, 2007

I searched for “Jerkwheat sex video” and it said:

Did you mean “Jerkwheat sex offender

4. Elric VIII Emperor of Melnibone - Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Jerkwheat – I believe I may take you up on that. I fake my way through all the songs I “know” anyway.

5. steve - Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Just to keep thing topical.

Currently, today, we have 4 hits for “road trip urine gatorade bottle”. This strikes me as a thing you think of on a spur of the moment in the car when your bladder is full. But then again, maybe somebody doesn’t want to get up from the computer.

6. DougOLis - Tuesday, May 22, 2007

where did it direct them?

7. steve - Tuesday, May 22, 2007

The #1 hit on google for “road trip urine gatorade bottle” is:

*golf clap* Well done Suss.

8. Andrea - Tuesday, May 22, 2007

BTO, what makes you think I haven’t?

9. DougOLis - Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Well, I guess that makes sense. Now I just want to know what was going through their mindset to search for that exact phrase.

I thought her luck ran out after the Friends series finale. This is not a Great Movie You May Have Missed. Ha!

10. MitchKayak - Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Oh, people can come up with statistics to prove anything, Kent. 14% of people know that.

11. steve - Tuesday, May 22, 2007

“Did you know that 58% of American males between the ages of 25-36 who drink between 6 and 11 alcoholic beverages a week carry between $3500 and $7000 worth of credit card debt?”

Good thing I drink more than 11 drinks a week, otherwise I’d be looking at a grim future.

12. Pete J. Hawk - Tuesday, May 22, 2007

You stole the words from my fingertips, el Stevo.

13. This picture is a Google Image result for "Sad Scouser" « W.W.F.U. - Wednesday, May 23, 2007

[…] a positive note, I got my name mentioned over at DeadOn, which is a site I highly recommend. Also, Liverpool’s loss has removed any temptation I may […]

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