jump to navigation

All Roads Lead to DeadOn: “Lasciate ogne speranza, voi ch’intrate” Edition Monday, April 16, 2007

Posted by Will Li in "poetry", 7 deadly sins, BowdenBowdenBowden, Elric, Search Strings.

Where Are the Sodomites Again?

So did my soul, that still was fleeing onward,
Turn itself back to re-behold the pass
Which never yet a living person left.

After my weary body I had rested,
The way resumed I on the desert slope,
So that the firm foot ever was the lower.

And lo! almost where the ascent began,
A panther light and swift exceedingly,
Which with a spotted skin was covered o’er!

And never moved she from before my face,
Nay, rather did impede so much my way,
That many times I to return had turned.

The time was the beginning of the morning,
And up the sun was mounting with those stars
That with him were, what time the Love Divine

At first in motion set those beauteous things;
So were to me occasion of good hope,
The variegated skin of that wild beast,

The hour of time, and the delicious season;
But not so much, that did not give me fear
A lion’s aspect which appeared to me.

He seemed as if against me he were coming
With head uplifted, and with ravenous hunger,
So that it seemed the air was afraid of him;

And a she-wolf, that with all hungerings
Seemed to be laden in her meagreness,
And many folk has caused to live forlorn!

Wait what?

We’ve had a ton of people landing here after searches about Inferno. Why shouldn’t we discuss . . . oh. Not the Divine Comedy?

MTV reality show? Seriously?

I was all ready to discuss the foreshadowing and biblical signifiers contained in the narrator’s encounter with the Leopard of Malice and Fraud, The Lion of Violence and Ambition, and the She-Wolf of Incontinence in the first Canto.

Can we talk about the She-Wolf of Incontinence anyway?

Fine. Party pooper.

At least let me point out that someone has been searching for “going down on some sheep or some shit,” and as a result of our vulgar, tax-evading friend Al Capone, DeadOn pops up first. Also, let this be your public service announcement that you have until Tuesday, the 17th, (tomorrow!) to file your tax returns (state taxes as well) or apply for an extension.

I’m not even sure what circle of hell is reserved for Ovinofellaters. I don’t remember that being listed by Dante. Maybe I missed it though, as it’s been a while since I read the Inferno. I’m more of a Boccaccio fan anyway.

Only two other things to note this week.

1) Handshakes and cupcakes all around, as both DeadOn and Ladies… were among the Top 10 blogs on WordPress this past Thursday.

DeadOn has contributor Baba Oje’s “Bloggers Reveal Their Favorite Movies” column to thank for that. I hope there are future installments in the works.

Special kudos to the Ladies… for their well-executed takeover of Kissing Suzy Kolber on Wednesday.

I must admit to Clare that I learned everything I know about flower arrangement from a certain English friend of mine

Maxi Pad slippers though? That’s new to me. Now why didn’t we make those in 6th Grade art class? They would have fit right in with God’s Eyes and Dreamcatchers, no?

Also, DeadOn should hit 95,000 page views by the time this post is published. Which means we should hit six digits sometime later this week. What does our lucky 100,000th page viewer get?

Maybe a God’s Eye and a pair of Maxi Pad slippers?

2) I would like to give contributer Holly/Magnolia the chance to respond to this search, as she can do it much better than I, and she’s been our resident expert the past few months.

(Holly, you may choose to express yourself in any way you choose, whether it’s prose, verse or pictograph)

“Why is Black Donnelley’s not on?”

Have at it, my friend.



1. Baba Oje - Monday, April 16, 2007

I think its time to mention that we get atleast 30 hits a day from the japanese girls without panties tag. it has skyrocketed a random asian youtube idol into the #4 alltime spot on deadon

2. Elric VIII Emperor of Melnibone - Monday, April 16, 2007

Good call – I need to start paying more attention to the referrers and not just the search engine terms.

3. LenBiasCocaineSurplus - Monday, April 16, 2007

Baba- We also got 2 people here from the search “anime sex”

4. Baba Oje - Monday, April 16, 2007

LBCS – Score! I guess I should have known that in Japan an “idol” is somewhere between a supermodel and pornstar. The pantyless tag along with “youtube” in the title lends itself towards the latter.

5. Holly - Monday, April 16, 2007

(Holly, you may choose to express yourself in any way you choose, whether it’s prose, verse or pictograph)

What about an entire post? I have, um, a FAIR FUCKING AMOUNT to say about this one.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: