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Traveling Exploits: Like a Limestone Cowboy Thursday, March 29, 2007

Posted by Suss-- in suss, Suss Travels More Than You.
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As most denizens of the Hoosier State are well aware, Southern Indiana is known for its vast deposits of sadness limestone. As I drove down I saw the limestone carved from the hills. And while the surroundings are rather beautiful, my hotel view ain’t. Neither is the hotel — just another Holiday Inn Express. You’d think they could just carve the entire hotel out of one piece of limestone. Not just walls and floors: phones, remote controls, room keys, everything. Well, except for toilet paper.

Before I delve into my glorious scenery, let’s revisit the view I had from my hotel room in Miami:

view_miami

For the visually inept: That was a golf course. Right outside my room. Now onto our view from my room in Bedford, Indiana:

view_bedford

Squint your eyes. Look, an Arby’s!

Bedford, in all fairness, is a pleasant little town, especially if you like towns whose population of churches outnumber their restaurants. According to the Wikipedia page, famous residents include the tip of Marty McSorley’s hockey stick as well as NASA astronaut Ken Bowersox, named after Boston’s AAA baseball team.

I saw neither of them during my stay in Bedford. But I will tell ya what I saw: motorcycles. And buttloads of ‘em.

As I sat in the Bedford laundromat on a Sunday afternoon — someone remind me to write a future installment on the smalltown laundromat experience, will ya? — it was noticeably the first summery day of the year (85 degrees). And all the middle aged dudes and their biker wives were putt-putt-putt-puttering down the 30-mph streets.

It’s not that the bikers are all between 40 and 50 years of age. Or that many of them are the typical bald-and-goatee variety. Or that many of them have ugly wives1. Or that they weren’t wearing helmets. Or that the engines are loud and annoying. Or that, despite their stature, require an entire parking space and road lane. It’s … no, wait, it is all of the above.

Personally the Hyundai Sonata works just fine for me. It may not be sexy, but if I hit a farm animal, I won’t die. It will. And plus, it’s a rental. But since I’m in Bedford, it’s not as likely that I’d smash into a cow so much as, say, a church.

1 – Remember, children, that stereotypes come from ignorance. Do stereotype at home. We’re professionals!

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Comments»

1. steve - Thursday, March 29, 2007

Through my travels in southern Indiana, I always seemed to think it looked like a good place for a serial killer movie to be shot.

Decrepit barns, leafless trees, and the guy at the convience store who ays “dems good”…. creeeepy shit.

2. mingusmonk - Thursday, March 29, 2007

OK. I gave Suss some shit in previous comments for bagging Indiana. Now I see he was staying in Bedford. So, um, yeah. Sorry about that.

A telling sign for any Indiana town’s wikipedia entry: “No Interstate highways are nearby; the closest is Interstate 65, approximately 35 miles (56 km) east.”

3. Weed Against Speed - Thursday, March 29, 2007

What’s Indiana?

4. Suss-- - Thursday, March 29, 2007

SR 37′s speed limit never exceeds 60 on the way down here. Which means most of the traffic never goes faster than 50, when you factor in grief over Daylight Savings Time.

5. Ivan - Thursday, March 29, 2007

Indiana….i got nothing. That whole area of the country is lost on me. And by area i mean anywhere that isnĀ“t within 50 miles of the coast.

6. undergroundbto - Thursday, March 29, 2007

Sadly, while at Purdue I visited by Bedford (went home with a guy on my floor to a house party). I spent the entire time laughing at all the silly white kids walking around in Starter jackets, unzipped, with no shirts on underneath, throwing up gang signs to ‘Gin and Juice’. Seriously. They were pretty pissed I was laughing, but once I mentioned I was from NY, they were too scared to say anything. It’s a very sad little place, where the kids race drunk on country roads with barely enough room for 2 cars going in opposite directions.

7. Holly - Thursday, March 29, 2007

Weed–it’s where they keep the Colts! COltycoltcoltsWOOOOOOOOOOIO!!!!!!!!111 *rolls around on tree branch like panda cub*

8. cdnmoose - Thursday, March 29, 2007

“I’m so hungry, I could eat at Arby’s…”

9. 12-inch Idongivafuck Sandwich - Thursday, March 29, 2007

I thought that’s what a golf course in Indiana looked like…

10. SA - Thursday, March 29, 2007

Wow, that picture makes me sad. Thanks for bumming me out Suss.

11. Bort - Thursday, March 29, 2007

Bedford itself is pretty depressing. I just remember driving through it to get to Spring Mill State Park, located near Gus Grissom’s home town, Mitchell.

Fuck you, state of Indiana, for making me take Indiana History in fourth grade and filling my brain with many needless facts!

If you need to get away, McCormick’s Creek state park and Brown County state park aren’t too far away from Bedford – and those places are pretty cool.


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