Urban HIMYMs: “Wait for It” — THIS IS SO GOING IN MY BLOG!

Ladies and gentlemen, I’m back. After about a month off, I’m shifting gears here on DeadOn and I’ll be presenting a season’s worth of recaps for How I Met Your Mother. Welcome to Urban HIMYMs.

I feel very lucky to have been in on the ground floor with HIMYM, in that it is arguably my favorite sitcom currently on the air (it runs neck and neck with 30 Rock). If I feel a special kinship with Ted Mosby, it’s because we’re the same age, still single, and we both worry that one day Bob Saget will be doing a voiceover of our lives. But I do feel like so many of the pop culture references are aimed directly at me. So, if I am a little too sympathetic towards Ted, please understand why. And with that, on with the recap.

(P.S.: There may be no rhyme or reason to this effort the first few times out. There will be spoilers, you have been so warned, but for right now, I am just trying to get my sealegs as a recapper.)

So, when last we left Ted, he and Robin had broken up, but had kept a lid on it until after Marshall and Lily’s wedding, which was a really cool thing when you think about it. Barney left us on a legen….and brought us back with a …dary.

But first, the yellow umbrella as the hidden symbol of the future? Really? Well, actually, yes. In the Victorian language of flowers, a yellow rose with red tips would symbolize falling in love, so maybe there’s something there. Or maybe it’s just a bold visual choice.

OK, I hate to admit it, but I laughed very hard at the bra half full line.

Ted proceeds to grow his break up beard. It looks good on Josh Radnor. My attempt at growing a beard resulted in 2006 patchiness and irritation to the point where it looked wrong. There’s no other term to describe it, save wrong.

I like the new paint color of the apartment. It’s a rich maple cream. (What, I’m pondering painting my condo?) And there’s a strong Barney triple to open the show, and then we see Robin arrive with her new Argentine beau, Gael.

So Ted’s hilarious mid-shave rant makes him look like a series of late 19^th Century figured (including a great Chester A. Arthur reference by Marshall, referencing the only shaved bear to serve as U.S. president), he talks about winning the breakup. WAIT…WIN THE BREAKUP!?! I knew it, I so totally knew it! To all of my female friends who told me I was insane, see. See… SEE!!!! I was right. You play…to win…the breakup. So when I lost the breakup, I had a right to be disappointed.

OK, I hate to make the point, but I feel compelled to do so. Gael is Paolo from Friends, Season 1. We’re trading Italian for Argentine, but that’s just soccer to soccer at this point. What would have been funnier? Canadian rebound!

“…And the Apollo 11 space capsule…this conversation never happened…”

I will also note, Alyson Hannigan without the really red hair makes me sad. Auburn is a fine choice, and it looks good on her, but…I do really really like Cobie Smulders new hair. She looks even better than last season.

Barney’s math rant about 12 does use one of my favorite jokes about break glass in case of emergency, but by this point, our second guest star has arrived, a tattooed, wild-haired Mandy Moore playing Amy. Mandy Moore, who looks really really good there.

OK, so a casual question at this juncture: At what point does Mandy Moore playing against type just end up being Mandy Moore playing towards type? It’s like Betty White, she is a sweetheart type, so she plays against type on Mary Tyler Moore, only to go back to playing toward type on Golden Girls, only to make a post Rose Nyland career playing against type like her role in Lake Placid.

Oh, a quick note to reset my Tied to the 90sness, the new Cadillac commercial using “Stars” by Hum, a fine fine choice.

I am really enjoying Barney being stuck in fifth wheel land. It’s amusing to me that he doesn’t know what to do…and the use of “Spoiler Alert” was a nice touch. Similarly, his ability to break the fourth wall without breaking the fourth wall is also highly amusing. His ability to be distracted by Ted’s travails to the point of not listening to the willing to do anything girl. But then as soon as Ted is gone, boom, back to being Barney.

Meanwhile, as Marshall breaks down whether Gael is a licensed massage therapist, Jason Segel reminds me how much I enjoy him being lawyer guy. It’s just great and subtle, especially when you know a lot of lawyers. A lot of lawyers.

The subtle joyful rivalry between Amy and Barney is also great because it’s nice to see that Barney is not always the winner in these things. And that a hot tub can solve any problem.

Just over Marshall’s shoulder, a box of Cap’n Munch on the refrigerator…Nice.

I wonder if the censors didn’t get a copy of this episode, because they’re just going right up to the line of verbal tomfoolery. This is almost Fox levels of raunch. Seriously, two straight shots there, but again proving that the funnier joke is the subtle one, not the obvious one.

You know, I’ve never once yelled “This is so going in my blog.” I have thought it, a lot, but never actually yelled it aloud. That’s probably for the best.

You know, I once thought about getting a tattoo, but between my massively low threshold for pain and my desire to get a Block M on my ankle like Tom Dolan, purportedly one of the most painful spots to be tattooed due to the high levels of bone, it never happened. Again, this is probably for the best. My brother has an awesome shamrock in the Irish tricolor between his shoulders, and it’s awesome. But he’s a cop, it fits the profile.

You know, I went and had a massage for the first time last summer, mostly to relieve the stress and well, it was not as good as advertised. And on a cost-benefit level, it’s even worse. Never again. Let’s move on.

Great act break there with the wonderful visual reveal, which comes back into a long string of friendly schadenfrude from Marshall, Lily, and Barney. The litany of names for a butterfly tattoo in the small of the back is epic: tramp stamp, ho tag, ass antlers, a Panama City license plate. It’s a comedic quadruple, but since tramp stamp is really more of the setup, it’s a solid comedy triple.

The about last night is sort of funny, but it’s really more of a breather than anything. I do appreciate, however, Lily and Marshall’s guilt over not being there for their best friend.

The closing scene has a wonderful meta moment where Ted talks about how his speech will have “No sweet indie rock song that swells up just as we’re about to kiss…”. It’s a wonderful touch to acknowledge how most Gen X&Y’s end up seeing love.

During this scene, however, Cobie Smulders proves just how good she is at what she does. She just totally sold the emotion on the loneliness and the hurt. You genuinely believe every word is from the heart.

Nice Cadillac cross-reference on Cadillac premiere night.

And if I have learned anything from Deadspin, always close with a dick joke. So there you have it…or wait, do you…

When we come back from the commercial, we see a great scene, almost set up in a 24 parody in terms of lighting and style, and we get a simple direction to www.slapcountdown.com Brilliant.

Now, as giving out grades all day is my job, I don’t want to do it in my free time. I will say that it was a solid episode, a great first step into the new season, a couple of genuinely funny moments, and some hit or miss moments. But I’m looking forward to next week’s episode, as always.

So, that’s all I have for this week’s edition of Urban HIMYMs. With that, this is Yostal reminding you to just chill, ‘til the next episode.